We live our lives each day thinking that everything will stay the same.  That the people we love will always be there.  Putting things off until the next day or the next month, believing they will still be there.  I have been putting things off, waiting for the right time not realizing that the right time could be now.  Right at this moment, fear is starting to creep within me.  I fear of losing one of the most important person in my life and I am not by her side.  Just because I am too busy.  Just because I am too tired.  Probably, I can visit her when I have a car.  I will visit her this Christmas.  I will bring her here in Manila when I finally have a car.  I will buy her gifts this Christmas now that I am earning more than enough.  I will probably be able to bring her somewhere nice.  But now, I am not sure if that will ever happen.  God, I hope I can still see her alive.  I wanted to run by her side but I have to wait for the bus.  I wanted to take care of her like she did to me when I was a kid.  I wanted to make her happy.  Not realizing that just seeing me, being with me makes me happy.

Categories : My Thoughts